My Unassisted Homebirth

This is the whole story, with all the details. On my personal blog I did a little more editing as so much of this was a surprise to so many. If you find youself with questions or a desire for more information, let me know I am happy to answer any and all questions!

My UCI had a c-section for my third pregnancy and wasn’t happy about it, my baby boy had been breech for sometime but my midwife never “noticed” and claimed that he must have flipped right before I went into labor. My instincts had told me for some time that something was off, but because I was under the care of a professional I didn’t question what my intuition was telling me. When I found out I was pregnant again I new that I wanted something different from last time, and at first I thought that would be a natural childbirth in the hospital with the same midwife. I had done more research, and learned more about pregnancy and birth since my third pregnancy and had some definite plans about what I wanted for this pregnancy and delivery. I waited until I was 13 weeks to go to my first prenatal appointment as I knew that it wasn’t necessary to go before than. I told my midwife that I didn’t want blood work done, but accepted that as a formality of going with her. I lay down on the exam table and my midwife exclaimed how big I looked, and was sure that it might be twins. Had she had her ultrasound equipment in the room she would have proceeded to try to do an ultrasound, we would have battled as I didn’t want any ultrasounds this pregnancy. Fortunately she didn’t have the equipment, but proceeded to tell me that I would need an ultrasound at 16 weeks I told her at this point that I didn’t want any ultrasounds, and she told me that I HAD to have one at 20 weeks. I was starting to feel helpless at this point, I was intimidated, and although I knew what I wanted I was having a hard time standing up for myself. Danny was a little taken aback, as he knew what I wanted as well, and was surprised that I wasn’t standing up for myself. After the visit on the car ride home I asked Danny what he thought, “It was awful, I hated it.” I wasn’t expecting that, but was relieved to know that I wasn’t the only one who was not happy with the visit. He then said ‘let’s do it at home”, I said “okay, should I call the homebirth midwife I had read about?” He said “no let’s just do it ourselves.” I agreed and said “okay”, his surprised reply was “It’s not illegal?” I said “nope.” The decision was made, and I never looked back. I knew that I didn’t need any “traditional prenatal care.” I know that I am ultimately responsible for my health and wellbeing and while pregnant I am guardian over my baby as well. I didn’t need a midwife or OBGYN telling me that I was okay, or that something was wrong. I would know well before them if something was off, and at that point I would get the type of care that I needed. I was in charge of my nutrition, exercise, and thoughts through my pregnancy. This was my fourth pregnancy, and the best of them all. I was more in tune with my body, more aware of my body, and more relaxed. It was a good day when I realized that this goodness came from me knowing these things myself. In the past I remember anxiously waiting for that monthly doctors appointment to be told that things were okay. I didn’t have to wait this time, I knew daily that I was okay. Upon finding out our plans to UC my mother asked point blank “What makes you think you know more than a midwife or OB about pregnancy and childbirth?” I replied, “Nothing, I don’t think I know more than them about it, HOWEVER, I do know more about my own body during pregnancy and that is what matters.” After the decision to UC I become a researcher of all things natural and childbirth. This is in my nature, and became a passion for several months early on. After feeling like I had acquired an adequate amount of knowledge I made myself stop looking. I knew that in order for this to go the best for me I had to rely on my faith in my Heavenly Father, myself, and my husband. Again this added to the enjoyment of the pregnancy. I learned to trust more than I had before, I learned to pray and listen and to quietly meditate.I loved getting all of the birthing supplies together, and am glad I took my time doing it. What started out as a really long list of things turned in to just a few. I knew that I wanted a water birth and so I got a birthing pool. I knew that I would want some of the blue “chux” pads to sit on or lay on. I started out with a list of several herbal remedies that was narrowed down to two, shepards purse and afterease tincture. I haven’t used either. A friend from church offered a homebirthing kit she had purchased and never used from there we got the umbilical cord clamps. To cut the cord I planned on using my hair scissors. To fill the pool I was going to buy a hose to hook to the kitchen sink but my Herculean husband was willing to carry 5 gallon buckets from the bathroom to the pool. We had a closet full of towels, and was reassured by other UCers that hydrogen peroxide would take any blood out (it does.) I got my receiving blankets ready for the baby, a hat, diaper, and some onsies, knowing that a baby really only needs something to help keep it warm, and a something to suck (breast) after birth. Once getting this all together the game was waiting. I never told anyone a specific due date, as babies come “due” when they are ready. I was aware of about where things were at, and going off of previous pregnancies I thought I would go into labor. As that day came and went, and then that week past on I started to feel the effects of being pregnant. My body got larger, my movements slower, the desire for donuts stronger, and the fatigue of the last 9 months started to catch up to me. I did stay focused on my belief that this baby would come when it was good and ready, I didn’t get to be the boss this time, I got to trust. On February 16 I had the distinct feeling in the evening that this baby would be arriving in the next 24 hours. Being an optimist I thought for sure that a few hours after that I would be in labor. I woke up the next morning pregnant but still had the “feeling”. I spent the day doing things as if I were going into labor soon. I let things slide with the kids, I skipped my Tuesday swim, I had Doritos and donuts for lunch, and when we cleaned up for the night I went into overdrive. I told Danny that he needed to have his phone with him, and needed to check in with me. At about 7:30 I started having contractions, nothing regular, or to intense, but enough to know that things were starting to move. I knew this was the case when I didn’t tell anyone what was going on. Danny got home from school and we watched American Idol and the Biggest Loser. We got into bed about 11:30 and I was still having contractions about 7 minutes apart, but again not enough for me to say anything to anyone. Shortly after getting into bed we were joined by Annika, and Nathan, just as we were all settled in my water broke! This is the second time this has happened, and I love it! I told Danny and for a minute he just lay there. I told him I needed a towel so I could get up, and avoid getting to much fluid on the bed. We got up, put Annika into her bed and starting to get things together. This was very easy, it consisted of moving a small box of supplies from our room to the “birthing arena” as my husband called it. My first two labors were 4 hours start to finish so I thought this would be the same. After a few hours Danny started to fill up the pool and I got in. I will never labor anywhere else again! It was so nice to be in the warm water, and while I think this contributed to my labor lasting a little longer it was okay with me. Every hour I would get up and go to the bathroom and knew that if I wanted things to get moving I would probably have to spend some time out of the pool. At one point I thought I needed to know what was going on so I tried to “check” myself. I didn’t know what I was looking for and was only able to confirm that the baby was in fact head down. After doing this a few times I realized it was futile and needed to stop. At this time I started to feel like I was going to be in labor forever and that things weren’t progressing. Danny found a homeopathic remedy for me (arnica) and while I denied that I needed it he gave it to me, and I am glad that he did. Within a few minutes of taking the arnica I had a new found resolve and trust in my body. I knew that I wouldn’t be in labor forever, but if it lasted 24 hours then that is what needed to happen. I knew I needed to get out of the water, this was at 8 am. I told myself that I would have this baby at 10 am. The time went by so quickly, I think my contractions got a little closer together, and their intensity increased. I went from silent breathing to low oooos. At 10 am I wasn’t ready to push but I was ready to get back into the water, I think in my subconscious mind I needed my other children away for the actual delivery to happen. I was so grateful that our friend Rudi was here, and that is was Wednesday. Annika has a tumbling class at the YMCA on Wednesday and so Rudi and the four kids gathered up and left at about 10:30. Once they were gone things started to move, I was concerned about pushing to soon and wanted to make sure that it was my body telling me to push and not my desire to be done. After trying to hold back through one contraction I knew that it was time. Danny knew this as well as the deep ooooos started to end in what he called opera singing. The pushing sensation all but overcame my body and I knew it was time. I pushed and thought I wasn’t getting anywhere until I felt the aptly named “ring of fire”. Since I had never felt this before it scared me a little and I thought for sure I was ripping in half. Luckily I knew that this was the time to slow it down and let things stretch. After a second push and feeling things move, everything seemed to stop. Time stood still for just a moment, every pain from the contraction and stretching was gone, it was as if I could get up and walk away from the whole thing. Then the next contraction hit and my babies head was born. I was on my hands and knees in the pool and was so happy to have Danny behind me to reassure me that he could see our baby’s eyes and nose and forehead, it was exactly what I needed to get me through the next big push. He checked to make sure there was no cord around the neck, but other than that he kept his hands off until after our baby was delivered. Once out he gently guided the baby from behind me, and I scooped her up and felt euphoria like I never had before. I couldn’t believe that I had done it, the feeling was so overwhelming and the beauty of the moment is one that can’t be put into words. I was leaned up against the side of the pool clutching my baby and was so grateful to know that I didn’t have to let her go until I was good and ready. Danny embraced me from behind, and we shared a moment of pure joy. About a minute after this our friend who was going to video the birth for us walked in the door. He was a bit shocked at the scene he saw as I was the first thing you saw from the front door but he came in and quickly took over the camera duties. After a little bit Danny finally asked me if I was going to look and see what the baby was, it was a girl. I knew all along that would be the case, had she been a boy I probably would have dropped him in the pool! About 20 minutes after she was born I was ready to get out of the pool, and ready to get things moving with the placenta, I didn’t feel like I could nurse her very well in the pool, we checked to see if the cord had stopped pulsing, it had so we cut the cord and we got out of the pool. We moved over to the couch and I put her to my breast, she wasn’t interested in nursing but the close contact got the contractions moving to get the placenta out. About 45 minutes after her birth I felt like I should stand a little to get gravity on our side, I hadn’t rushed anything with the delivery of the baby, but I was more than a little anxious to deliver the placenta. I stood a little and pushed and gently pulled on the cord just to see if anything was moving. The first time I tried this nothing happened so I left it alone a few minutes later I tried again and felt the cord move so I pushed a little harder and delivered the placenta. I had never felt this part of the process before, and in the moment I felt more relief from this than delivering the baby. My other four children arrived home shortly after that and things got a little whirlwind after that. They were so excited to see their baby sister, Annika was so happy that she could in fact call the baby rainbow girl. In a flurry of activity I held the baby and shared her with the other kids, Danny inspected and cut up the placenta and I finally remembered how hungry I was. Through the entire labor I remember how hungry I was but I refused to eat because of the nausea I felt every time I thought about eating. After a piece of toast and some vitamin water I started to feel very light headed. I hadn’t torn at all when I delivered the baby, and my bleeding was minimal after delivering the placenta. Just to make sure things were okay Danny took my blood pressure and that was fine, I think it was just a combination of exhaustion, low blood sugar, and a drop from the adrenaline rush. Because I knew that it would help I asked for a piece of placenta, Danny dropped it on my tongue and I swallowed it down, and surprised myself when I asked for another piece. Arrangements were quickly made for the girls to go spend the afternoon with Chris and Rudi, and Nathan was put down for a nap. At this point we weighed and measured and decided on the name. I liked the middle name Joy or Noel, but Danny wasn’t sold, after a few minutes he said what about Rose. At first I thought Rose? But after saying her full name in my head a few times I knew that was it. Her name is Katelyn Rose Hansen, she weighed 7 pounds 4 ounces and was 19.5 inches long. A little side note that makes the name even more special is Danny’s older brother, who died several years ago, when he and his girlfriend where expecting had chosen the name Katelyn spelled the exact same way me and Danny decided upon, we didn’t know this until after Danny had talked to his mom and told her the name. I knew the name was special, because it means pure, and that is what I felt about this whole experience. I also know that the angels where there to help guide and protect me through the experience. And I know that Katelyn knew her uncle Michael before she joined us. My recovery has been the best I have had, the joy and gratitude I feel in my heart has increased ten fold. I know that it was through my previous labors and deliveries I was led to UC, and I wouldn’t change a single one of them. They are all special to me, I learned and grew from each of them and they all had an impact on my decision to UC. The greatest difference to me with my UC was the amount it increased my spirituality. My faith is deeper and stronger, my love for my husband has increased and my gratitude and testimony of eternal families has only strengthened. The joy I feel when I look at all five of my children causes me to rejoice. I know that each and every one of them is a gift from God. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me, and watches over me. I know that when I pray I will receive an answer and that he is guiding me and helping me with the Holy Ghost, and the people that have been put into my life. Although I felt pain like I had never felt before during the height of my delivery, I have since experienced joy like I have never felt before. Because of the deeper ability to feel joy and love I wouldn’t change a single contraction, or discomfort that I experienced during my pregnancy, labor, or delivery. We are only able to feel joy to the extent that we have felt pain, making the entire journey, the physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional journey worth every second.